Monday, February 8, 2016

The strange world of WhatsApp !

I have noticed the following universal pattern
1.   Friends: The usual list of acquaintances, many of whom are there by default through the contacts; one usually keeps in touch with a select few of them.
2.   Family: Similar to the above, a default group as they exist in your contacts; One tends to keep even lower contact with than friends.
3.   Groups: This is dicey and varied J
a.   The first is a family group: This is probably the worst of the lot. Usually initiated by an overenthusiastic family member, it grows alarmingly fast, and thankfully saturates soon. The admin adds people at random, many of whom appear only as a number and you usually have no clue about them. As the family is now spread all over the globe alerts are usually non-stop. This group reeks of hypocrisy. There is usually a good morning message (by at least 10 members) with either a bunch of flowers or some pseudo psychological/philosophical message or both. Thanks to the global spread the Good Morning messages occur all the time. This is followed by some banter involving three or four and the rest are condemned to read the same. Non-participation is seen as snobbish. Participation is simply not possible for any sane human being. This is followed by posts of personal achievements and that of the children. Escaping is not possible. Departure is not allowed. One needs to explain why. And is often reintroduced. The best philosophy is to remain silent.
b.   The second is the dirty group: This comes under various disguises but essentially a forum of all males (or all females) to get as dirty as possible under the cover of the virtual world. This is the forum to share dirty jokes. Most of them touch upon the hidden fantasies of the members. The main them is usually adultery and followed by spouse bashing. This is usually a no limit group. The level of depravity is limited only by one’s imagination or access to online material. As not a single joke is an original. Usually all forwards. Normally groups survive on mere forwards. Once in a while this will also be used for personal achievements to be advertised. Almost always with a smiley though no one knows why a smiley is needed. And once in a while a member will feel that the image of the group should be given a coat of sanity and a forward of TED video (usually never seen in full by the sender himself beyond two minutes) and it meets with the same fate at the other members too. Or some spiritual talks on how the world can be a better place. And on usual national holidays like I-day and R-Day, some Pak bashing is a norm. This is by far the riskiest group. As a person is usually a member of more than one such group. As a result one ends up forwarding the jokes to the same forum or the worst nightmare where one forwards to the family group!!!!!!!!!!
c.   The third is a small family group: Usually the immediate family. Initiated by the mother and only the mother keeps it active with the rest chipping in with monosyllables.
d.   The fourth is a momentary group : This is usually started with a specific event, and thankfully gets disbanded once the event is over. The event can be a wedding, world cup or whatever! This is the least of the groups that is really a bother.
e.   The fifth is by far the best group: Usually between three or at the most four individuals between whom there exists no pretense. The exchanges here are straight from the heart. The bullshit meter reads zero. Here one can say what one wants and no explanations are needed. The traffic in this group is usually low but the contents are far better and important.


  1. Agree totally Kishan! I liked the third one about small family group as it applies to us so well! Monosyllables, yes very much!!

    Perhaps you have not noticed but here in India we have many BJP & Modi Bhakts who non-stop keep sending messages applauding NaMo and BJP's so called achievements! Most of them are naturally Gujjus! There also Pappu bashing!

  2. political groups are not the norms with me but shameless Pak bashing pisses me off